Thursday, January 15, 2009

Life has been Crazy!!!!

Wow. It has been along time since I have blogged, so get ready for a long read! Where do I begin?
Well, the last day that I posted was October, 22 two days before my life got crazy!!
My Chelsie bug became a teenager on October the 24th and my life has been turned upside down.
You can't be prepared for the teenage girl it is a daily emotional, hormonal, boy crazed, giggling, goofy, parents are so not cool, filled life!!!!!!!! And what makes it so crazy is the fact that you may experience all of the above behavior/emotions in a 10 minute window of time!
So my sweet little sissy springs her "boyfriend" on me the week of her birthday.
Boyfriend!!! What!!! Okay, take a deep breath. You can handle this, I mean think of all you have been through, this will be a walk in the park compared. Right?
This is what I thought..
I think that Icried daily for at least a month!
So that is where I have been the last few months.
Dealing with the teenage drama.
I made it through the holidays remarkably well. This was the first Christmas since Hunter died that I felt no stress.
Yes, I missed my sweet baby boy, desperately. I went into it with zero expectations of how I should feel or how others react to me. I did not expect anyone to remember that I may be in a funk or anything else for that matter. It was very freeing.
I went to counseling and was asked where I am in regard to the "Black Hole".
I have learned that the black hole is not so dark if you hang out with it and figure out exactly what it is all about. So instead of running from it, I invited it to pull up a chair and hang out!! :)

I have spent a huge amount of time with the Lord, much of it requesting help with this new season of motherhood I have entered into, and He has led myself and Donnie to make some really tough decisions concerning our family.
It is like a whole new and different time of persecution and trial for us as parents.
When your children are younger the decisions you make are pretty much black and white clear cut decisions.
When they get older it gets very complicated and involved and just down right hard!!!
Do you ever feel like you are being opposed on every front even when you know with all your heart and soul that you are making the right choice for yourself and your family, but no one seems to understand?
It is so hard, because the ones that are not understanding why it is you are doing what you are doing, and questioning the whole process are people that you love very much and value their thoughts and opinions. It is so hard. And very lonely sometimes.
Donnie and I pray a lot for God to guide us as we parent Chelsie and make decisions for our family.
I probably need to change my blog name to Riding the Teen Crazy Train!!
I am always open for any ideas and advice on how to handle this process.
I have gotten a few good suggestions, my favorite so far has been (one that I also thought to myself) that I need to get a life!!!! That sounds a little harsh, but I did not think so, maybe I need to get a hobby.
If you're a mom (especially of little ones) you are thinking , hobby? What is that??
Oh, yeah, I think my husband has a few of those!!!! (Tee Hee)
Soooo, if you leave a comment throw out a hobby that I may be able to immerse myself in while Chelsie is over at a friends house, at a dance, watching her "boyfriend" play basketball, etc.....
Yes, I did say boyfriend again. Yes it is the same one that she sprang on me the week of her b-day. It is really a record for thirteen year old to be "going out" ( this what they call it these days,where are you going at 13????) for three whole months without at least ten or so break-ups.
He is precious! I just love him, he is a great kid and great with my sissy bug!!
Well, I think I have brought you up to speed, the Readers Digest version of course.
I will be back on much sooner than before, so don't give up on me yet!!


Jennifer said...

Well I'm sure you've thought of scrapbooking.

How do you feel about cooking or baking? You can get some cookbooks from the library or use some of the awesome websites (, If you have cable, check out Food network sometimes.
If you don't like to cook, your hobby could be visiting a bunch of restaurants from all over Knoxville and reviewing them on your blog. I've always wanted to do something like that.

Pam said...

I have a friend here who has taken up felting. I don't know a whole lot about it at all, but it looks really cool and there are tons of websites about it.

I love the food reviewer idea. I've always thought that would be cool, too.

Maybe you could take up photography or painting? Who knows what fun surprises God has in store for you with a new hobby?

Wow, a "boyfriend"! We've not even begun to cross that bridge yet, though my own 13-yr.old is starting to notice certain guys are "hot", which makes this mama a tad uncomfortable at times. Praying for you, sweet friend.